A Solicitor Speaks

Below is an un-edited e-mail that i recieved from a solicitor on saturday morning after e-mailing her about a book that she has written entitled Fathers Matter. A link for more info about the book can be found on my Blogroll (fathers matter) I have ordered a copy of the book and intend to review it here on my blog. I did inform the author of the book that I intended to post her e-mail on my blog and asked her to contact me if she had any objections to this, I havent heard back from her so I presume that I have her consent, so thank you Celia.

Amendment: Due to a problem with e-mail, I may have lead people to believe that Celia still works in private practice, this is NOT the case, after becoming disillusioned with the current leagle system in 2001, she wrote her book “Fathers Matter” and has since made her living as a writer and not a solicitor.

Dear Kenny
Thank you for your e-mail and for your kind remarks. My motivation in writing Fathers Matter is to help devoted loving fathers with their diverse problems.
I’ve read your Blog and all the replies to it and it’s clear you (and the other fathers who have commented) have had a very raw deal and to say that the family law system has let you all down is an understatement. Unfortunately, it is an all too often complaint. The trouble is that so many people go to law with the expectation that if they pay a ‘top’ solicitor who then instructs a ‘top’ barrister they will get the result they want. The sad reality is that the system is so deficient that you can pay thousands and thousands of pounds and still not get anywhere near the result which is in the best interest of your child(ren). Then of course when you complain to your lawyer you’re told ‘we acted upon your instructions’ when they were the ones who gave you the advice to pursue the matter in the first place. You end up with a hefty bill which remains to be paid, your life in tatters and they abrogate all responsibility.
I think that more and more people, fathers in particular, are acting as litigants in person because as one father said to me ‘why should I pay my solicitor thousands of pounds only to put my case a tenth as well as I could put it myself?’ Costs are prohibitive. Somebody contacted me last week saying he wanted to appeal against an order but his solicitor had told him it would cost up to £25,000 so what can he do? He doesn’t have the money to pursue the case. .
We all know that the best way to deal with the law is to keep away from it but that would be in an ideal world and this is certainly not one. The fact remains that warring parties who can’t resolve matters get caught up in the system and it’s the children who suffer.
A grandmother e-mailed me the other day to tell me that her son, who had been denied all contact with his daughter for the past 2 years for no reason whatsoever, save the hostility of the mother (the daughter is not yet even 3) committed suicide by torching himself six weeks ago – he didn’t die for three days. I cried when I read her e-mail because his death was avoidable and now a mother has lost her only son and a daughter has lost her father. And hers is not the only tragic tale that I have personally been told.
Please feel free to come back to me about what you’re doing.
Kind regards

I have to say that my own experiences of solicitors have made me extremely skeptical of them to say the least, but maybe this shows that the barrel is not completely rotton to the bottom and there may be a few good apples still in there somewhere, but they are obvioulsy few and far between. The last paragraph of that e-mail, upset me to say the least and since saturday I often find myself thinking of this poor little girl who will never see her dad again, will she ever know the truth about her daddy? That he loved her, that he wanted to desperately be with her? Or will she be told some pack of lies by her mother about how daddy died in a road traffic accident or suffered a terrible illness when she was a baby that he never recovered from. Worse still maybe this little girls daddy will never be acknowleged.

If I had my way there would be a Judge standing in the dock answering for this crime, because no matter how I look at it, that is all I see, a crime commited against a little girl, a little girls grandmother, and anyone else who knew and cared for this man. But a judge walks free for something that can in my mind only be described as murder. I don’t know anymore details than those contained in the e-mail above, but I intend to trawl the internet to see if I can find out more. As far as I am concerned the Judge might as well have handed the man a can of petrol and a box of matches the day that he forbade him to have any contact with his daughter.

Why are these people regarded as being above the law? They should be the ones standing in the dock’s of their own “Kangaroo” Courts answering for the crimes that they commit against humanity every day, trampling over the human rights of both men and children. To say that some of their decisions are ludicrus would be an understatement. In 2004 a man who had been ordered to have no contact with his daughter by the court saw her in the street and waved to her…….. mother took him to court for this and the Judge decreed that by waving he had broken a court order and sentenced him to 10 months in prison. Ten months in prison for daring to wave to your own child!!! This probably cost the tax payer in the region of £30,000 ( I think figures state £33,000 per prisoner per year) why should this abuse of power and the tax payers money go unpunished?

We can stop this by standing together as fathers, brothers and sisters, parents and people who care. Great journeys start with a single step. Take the step get intouch and help spread the word.


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